Friday, September 21, 2012

Moving on...

This song has been in my head for two days. It comes back over and over again because it's made me think of all the people in my life who are in such similar places. Where is that place? Trying as hard as we fucking can to learn from our mistakes, perhaps pondering decisions we want to make in the future, wishing like hell we make better ones the second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth time around. I learned from writing my novel that I have a tendency to do the same things repeatedly, expecting a different result, and we all know that definition. We all have a novel in us, but we express it in different ways. As long as we express it, I consider it written, it's through that expression that we learn about ourselves.

My mom said, "In order to find love, you have to know you. In order to know you, you must have the courage to experience and fail. So, in order to know love, you must have failed--hit a note with any of us? Yeah. Duh.

So, I come back to this song, and what this song says to me is that if ever there's a person who is right for me, then I want to feel this way about her, and her about me, because this song is about heart, that unmistakable hold that you happily, trustfully allow someone to have on you and that you have on them--two hearts together that can accomplish wonderfully amazing things that we could never do alone. I believe in this. And this song is about light, how when we shine, then we wouldn't trade each other for the most trustworthy source of light known to man, the sun, because we give each other the light we need to live. I've been writing about it and trying to find it for years, and I still believe in it, and I hope that never changes.

When you have 4 minutes at the end of your day, listen to the song in your ear buds and read along to the lyrics.

And I love her so
I wouldn't trade her for gold
Walking on moonbeams
I was born with a silver spoon

Hell I'm gonna be me
Gonna be free
Walking on moonbeams
And staring out to sea

And if a door be closed
Then a row of homes start building
And tear your curtains down
For sunlight is like gold

Hell you better be you
And do what you can do
When you're walking on moonbeams
And staring out to sea

'Cause if your skin was soil
How long do you think before they'd start digging?
And if your life was gold
How long do you think you'd stay living?

And I love her so
I wouldn't trade her for gold

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