I'm not here...

That there
That's not me
I go
Where I please
I walk through walls
I float down the Liffey
I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here

In a little while
I'll be gone
The moment's already passed
Yeah it's gone
And I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here

Strobe lights and blown speakers
Fireworks and hurricanes
I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here

--

"Thank you very much. Good night."

Dear Bee...

Dear Bee Outside of My Window,

Image by Lydia Elle - barely flickring :( via Flickr

I thank you for coming to see me. I thank you for the transference of thought. From you to me, I sense the fact that you are lost. When you saw your reflection in my window, I knew that you, if only for a brief second, recognized yourself and thought that you were home.

You thought you were home, that is, until you received what thought I sent to you; your journey is far from over, but you must continue for there is no time to linger on my sill. The time that you have to find your destination is much shorter than mine--days compared to years--so you must be on your way.

I know that the contemplative sounds of Radiohead in this temporary world that I've constructed for myself are what brought you here, intuitively on both of our parts. No coincidence in manner, but a calling for that moment of transference that I previously mentioned. Thank you for listening and heeding the call. There was purpose.

And now, we can both be on our way, each to our Queen--and her true love.

Safe journey,
B

My Morning Repeat: Radiohead

I've been listening to the same Radiohead song on repeat this morning because the beat and the lyrics are in sync with my mood. This morning, I woke without rest and left a place that I didn't want to leave. My restlessness was because I felt hearts part--protection due to confusion--11 hours earlier than the actual, physical good-byes.

Well, if you're really gonna leave, then it's time to get ta goin.' Unfortunately, this is not a "Live in the NOW" mentality.

Street Spirit (Fade Out) lyrics
Rows of houses, all bearing down on me
I can feel their blue hands touching me
All these things into position
All these things we'll one day swallow whole
And fade out again and fade out

This machine will, will not communicate
These thoughts and the strain I am under
Be a world child, form a circle
Before we all go under
And fade out again and fade out again

Cracked eggs, dead birds
Scream as they fight for life
I can feel death, can see its beady eyes
All these things into position
All these things we'll one day swallow whole
And fade out again and fade out again

Immerse your soul in love
IMMERSE YOUR SOUL IN LOVE.
--
"Fade out again." Ack. No, not again.
"Immerse your soul in love." Yes. Immersion, please.

I still need to work on being in the NOW... we all need to work more on being in the NOW. Take advantage of what's right in front of our eyes because tomorrow we may, once again, be worlds apart... otherwise, our morning repeat will be to fade out again.

Read more bigBADbobisms.