Friday, November 14, 2008

What Kind of Love Do You Want?

Amanda Mandy,

I'm happy to have received your comment on my PlazaBUZZ blog about Club Blonde... even more happy to have discovered your blog, where I've enjoyed reading your most recent posts.

However, I saw no opportunity to return the comment! ;)

Because you've shared publicly, I'll share my story and my thoughts with you about your relationship...

Timing is just as important as attraction. I was lucky enough to learn this in my first serious relationship. I was trying to build a career and maintain a relationship. She was trying to build a relationship and maintain a career. At a different time and place, we might have been fantastic together. But in that time and place, we prioritized things differently. It was contentious.

What type of person are you seeking? Do you believe in true love? Is your current relationship reflective of what you think true love should be?

I'm a believer in true love. I'm not a believer in perfection. We will always have to work at things... matter-of-fact, we don't mind working on things to improve them. We're Americans, it's what we do. We forge forward and learn from our mistakes to get better at what we do. We do this for our entire lives, so having to do this in a relationship should be expected.

Most recently, I had been trading emails with two women who had captured my attention. With both of them, I had to simply ask for their pardon, but if they didn't have time for coffee, then I wasn't optimistic about their time for a relationship. Similar to you, I heard and respected their replies, "Not emotionally in a place in life for a serious relationship." So it goes, we move on.

I guarantee, if the right person walked into anyone's life at any moment at any time, there would be no such thing as bad timing. We all love a challenge, but I've no idea why we persist to force them into our relationships making them the biggest challenges of our lives. Shouldn't we be focusing on world hunger or helping the disadvantaged or walking the elderly across the street?

I'm upfront. I want to find an amazing woman to walk next to me in life. Dating to date isn't of interest to me. I want the world and all the ups and downs in it... those ups and downs quelled by the two of us conquering challenges together. I want to walk side-by-side with my significant other, but all-the-while knowing that there will be times when I need to lead, she needs to lead or either one of us needs to be led.

This is the love I want. This is how I define true love.

So I ask you, "What kind of love do you want?"

Sincerely,
Bobby

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wow, I didn't think anyone else thought that way. The only thing I would add would be to truly like that person because many years later it won't matter what we looked like when we were 20 something or 30 something. It's when you are 70 or 80 and siting across the room and you can look across the room and say to yourself or even out loud "After all the years together, what an amazing person!"

Hope you find that girl! She will be a lucky one! BEST OF LUCK!!!