Thoughts that didn't want to be poetic...

A close friend said to me a few weeks ago, "I'm still working on myself." I was struck by the obvious: of course you are. To me, it's the nature of life to be constantly learning, reading, thinking, working on one's self. I want to understand how to run a better brainstorming session. I want to read more about story-telling. I want to be a better writer. I want to improve upon the strength that my shoulder and my ear often lend to others struggling with life's decisions.

Image by nerovivo via Flickr

Yes, I think we should all be "working" on ourselves.

The problem arises when working on yourself gets in the way of decision-making. When working on yourself becomes an excuse for inaction. Now don't misunderstand me, I'm not saying that this particular friend is in that position... maybe, maybe not... but I recommend to all that a position of allowing decisions to make themselves is no strong position at all. In the circumstance of indecision--do I want to do this or do I want to do that--

Oh hell, just say it and stop being verbose...

If you can't decide what to do about a decision that demands complete commitment, then the decision has already made itself. And, once you've accepted that reality, then the whole world of opportunity--a world meant for your happiness--opens up to you. The world will cease to be so suffocating; color will return with breath.

For the sake of...

I don’t have an answer today—haven’t had them for a few weeks. The concept of knowing has escaped me. Or, perhaps I’m simply waiting for you to know, so that you can give me all of the answers... if only it were so simple.

Image via Wikipedia

Oddly enough, things are often more simple than we make them out to be, if we can find the straight line to the solution. I once had an architecture professor who said that we should pull all-nighters on our projects the first nights after we get them, not the last nights before they are due. For those that don’t know that world, the last two or three nights before a project is due, students are always pounding out drawings, burning their fingers on the hot glue gun while slapping together models, and imbibing in their preferred caffeinated beverage, coffee or Mountain Dew since they had the highest caffeine content back before we had energy drinks. The reason I used to stay up all night when I first got a project was so I could find the philosophy behind it; the philosophy would give me the template for design decisions that would have to eventually be made. Ultimately, having a theoretical template for a project also made it easy to endure the often intense critiques by visiting professors.

Is life really so much different?

In other words, when we are trying to accomplish something, shouldn’t we figure out what we want before we make a plan to get there? Take the time to sit down and understand the emotional need that must be met. Once you have that, then the decisions along the way are easy to make; does this get me closer to meeting my emotional need, or not? We put way too many variables into life. What will he think? What will she think? What will my friends think? What will my parents think? I have been just as guilty as the next person, until I started to write; writing has helped me to simplify. I encourage everyone to do whatever task they have in their life that is synonymous with “writing;” the task that allows you to think.

If we don’t know where we are going, then the odds of getting there are minimal.

Maybe you’re an optimist. Maybe luck has been in your favor for most of your life. Maybe sometimes you drive without direction and still end up in the right place. But seriously, is that how you want to live your life? Doesn’t flipping a coin everyday get really fucking old?

I believe in opportunity, which can be defined in many ways, but with all of them you must be ready to take advantage of them. We have decisions in life that we regret, hopefully we learned from them, and if given the opportunity to mend them or relive them, most would say, “Yes, I’ll take it!”

When asked if you’d go back and do it over again a different way, would you? What if you didn’t have to go back, would you take the time to make things right in the now?

I would rarely go back because I think there was something that I had to learn from my previous decision. You know the verse, “You take the high road and I’ll take the low road?” I might have gotten here before you, but the point is that both roads go to the same place. While each teaches something different, they both bring us back together.

For the sake of... what? If your reason to do something is “for the sake of,” then you’ve put yourself in a position of regret, unless you finish the phrase with yourself—for the sake of yourself. I don’t mean that in a selfish way. You can only know what you know, and you’ll never be able to address all the future variables in your world; what everyone else will think. However, you can make decisions based on what is fully under your control—all that makes up you. By making your good heart happy, you make everything and everyone around it happy.

If you refuse to get caught up in the rest of the world, but vow to do good in it, then it really is that simple.